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(time started work: 9:13pm) (i was really early today) (time started blog: 10:13pm) no weekend fun for christa. that's why the blog is coming early. and they will be posted on thursdays now instead of mondays. you can handle it! one more encounter with the bastard operator from hell while the 90 pics load.... It's friday, so I get into work early, before lunch even. The phone rings. Shit! I turn the page on the excuse sheet. "SOLAR FLARES" stares out at me. I'd better read up on that. Two minutes later I'm ready to answer the phone. "Hello?" I say. "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, I'VE BEEN TRYING TO GET YOU ALL MORNING?!" I hate it when they shout at me early in the morning. It always puts me in a bad mood. You know what I mean. "Ah, yes. Well, there's been some solar activity this morning, it always disrupts electronics..." I say, sweet as a sugar pie. "Huh? But I could get through to my friends?!" "Yes, that's entirely possible, solar activity is very unpredictable in it's effects. Why last week, we had some files just dissappear from a guys account while he was working on it!" "Really?" "Straight Up! Hey, do you want me to check your account?" "Yes please, I've got some important stuff in there!" "Ok, what's your username..." He tells me. Honestly, it's like shooting a fish in a barrel. Twice. "How many files are in your account?" I ask "Um, well there should be about 20 in my thesis writeup, 10 or so with the data for it, and another 20 or so in a book that I'm writing" "Hmmm. Well, I think we caught it just in time. You've still got 2 files left... .cshrc and .login" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaggggggggghhhh!" He sobs into the receiver a bit - it really turns my stomach. The phone rings almost as soon as I've got "Top Gun" in the video machine so I pause the video and put the phone on hands-free. "I think I've bought a bad floppy disk" "Yes?" I wonder if I've suddenly become the consumer watchdog? "Well, I've got this disk and it won't format. All the others in the box did so I thought I must have a bad disk" "Why are you calling me about this?" I ask "Well, the disk says guaranteed; where do I go to get a replacement?" Ah! Of course. "Well, let's see. Are you sure it's the disk, and not just some problem with static buildup?" "Huh?" "Static Buildup, you know, static electricity that's passed from you to the computer" "But I'm wearing a wrist strap!" Around about now I realise I'm deep in dweeb country. Wrist straps aren't fashion accessories in *my* part of town... "Of course you are, but your average wrist strap has a 1 meg resistor in series with it, a *really* poor earth. What you need is a direct earth connection. Hang onto the frame of something that's earthed properly." "What, you mean like our stainless steel work bench?" "Excellent. Now, have you got a paper clip to discharge the static with?" "Hang on. Yeah" "Ok, with your other hand, poke the clip thru the ventilation holes at the back of the unit, and just touch the contact at the end of the thick red wire." "The one going to the power supply?" "Yep, that's it" "....Hey, isn't that the li... >kzzzzt!< >clunk<" Another call solved by the helpdesk from hell... hahahhahahaha i LOVE the bastard operator from hell. i realize that probably more than 80f the people reading this have no idea what this is about or even what i do. call 808-473-7142 and i'll answer, if i'm at the helpdesk. then you'll see what i mean. call me! but if i'm too busy i'll hang up on you. so anyway, like i said, i'm adding in some pics i missed from last week. tuesday was the opening night for the whole "raw" party at queen bee. yes, THAT queen bee over by ward. where blaze had his birthday party last year. it was pretty cool EVERYONE came over for the $20 all you can eat sushi because it was the MAIN MAN making it tonight  places in hawaii that have karaoke are not like the mainland. there's no real "stage" people just pass around the microphone and sing from their high-backed booths. you really don't ever know who's singing. it's not like a huge goofy "production" like it is on the mainland.  the lovely erin was out tonight  mmmm all you can eat sushi..... mmmmm... jonah? MMMMM!!!  erin, aukai, rick, kalei, vincent, jen vo, jonah, malia, erin, sarah, olena, etc etc etc all showed up so they gave us the back room. that was super nice of them. we caused a little bit of trouble back there.... see aukai's page for the pics of him sexually harrasing the poor waitress...... TIME for a timer pic.  the special tonight. oh dear, nelly.  a special appearance by tall chad and josh  strolled over to thirtynine tonight. goobs broke his thirtynine cherry tonight. whatever, it's not like i saw much of him. ugh. BUT! me and francis are both wearing dior  mark AND olena both broke their thirtynine cherries too. and JEN VO was out! holy smokes it was a great fucking night  patio love  okay so tonight after this i cruised to pussycat lounge with a now more attentive jason, a bored but still coping neil, and an enthusiastic but weary mike. it didn't last. but i DID see angie n her new hot man. and ruthie and her hot girlfriends and one big scary one. and AJ is in town from hollywood. they never can stay away. *yawn* tonight was eh. so wednesday i woke up nice and late and cruised down to the fox n hound in kahala because my lovable housemate was throwing his last shin dig there.  ed gave me his cheeseburger n fries. i didn't have the heart to tell him i was about to go have dinner. i ate most of it anyway. ha!  "ooooh! what's this brown stuff?" i ask john. "it's pineapple blunt wrapper" he says. "like try?" he says. SHIT. i say. shit shit shit shit. oh well.  time to meet daniel at the new trendy mc-trenderson fusion place over on kapahulu. "808" ooooo roody-poo! remember what i said last week? about how i ordered the cheese plate and it came with SALTINES? um, yeah  but tai the bartender was the shit and he made us special shots. this one was pretty nasty, actually. and it became more of a dessert after a while. really chewey. eeeeew. daniel is a sport and downed both shots. fucking rad, man.  okay then thursday you already know so ..... let's move on to THIS week! i worked friday night. lame! you know about saturday from last blog. exciting! so exciting, that you get to see malia's pics: moucho blondos  actor. rockstar. hottie.  everyone  er, someone... doing.... something  we love jose. he is fucking hot hot hot  after this we all loved him EVEN MORE.  awwww pedro. oh shit, nice boob shot.  okay okay okay... so sunday was the commercial shoot for wave. so much fucking fun. I LOVE FLASH  candee! look hot! aaaaaaaand scene.  aww matty. so inconspicuous about it.  the OG was on-site makeup artist. that's why i look so good.  the original quintet  between takes. can't get enough of brian  cheryl. me. candee. aimee. what.  these girls were looking so fab. you'll see.  the cool kids.  i love kawika kane. did you see him in the star-bulletin last week? mmmm.  guess who has my camera now  just guess....  ummmm, flash? ding ding ding!!! ooooh! THIS chest is my favorite  flash and aimee. *sigh* pls name your first daughter "christa"  kalei and some hot fucking rockstar  the photographer was pretty hot. they usually ALL are....  so yeah, the commercial will run on vh1, mtv, e! and comedy central all march. get your tivos ready. oh wait, i forgot, this is hawaii. so after this i ran over to the friends and family dinner at thirtynine. i'm IN laddat. besides, my number one fashionista client was cooking.  jen vo. aukai. um..... are you ok?  okay. so the vibe tonight was definately more laid back then.  the usual musicians. the usual artists. plus one designer.  monday was a cruise day. lunch in hawaii kai w the O wave. this is at my favorite studio cafe.  i love the marina  what else did i do today. crap. i can't remember. oh yeah. okay! so tuesday. started with a pool day.  i know i know. it's SUCH a beautiful day in honolulu. it's been nice all week. zana on the phone  poor sick dog was very upset with us because we wouldn't dive for his boulder  i have a "take-pictures-of-palm-trees" fettish.  now skip to later. barely made it through "constantine" i liked it cause that chick from the beach and vanilla sky played gabriel. but i don't know much about the whole theology behind heaven and hell so it was somewhat confusing. broke my bucca cherry after tho. goobz and a bunch of wine bottles  time for thirtynine again, remember, it's TUESDAY.... some artist and hawaii's own chris lam  ooooh andie tastes goooood  jamal and teddy jumped on the mic tonight. i was next.  rick. zana. aukai. RICK! it's dr. rick everyone! RICK RICK RICK RICK RICK!  guess who. shit, the boyz II men tee kills the suspense.....  brian with pommy, the city's most eligible bachelor at the moment  wait, these two are eligible too....  my dinner dates. gina. goobz. ross. a newly goatee'd chris. jenny. and neil.  so now it's wednesday. er, YESTERDAY. yeah, it's gonna be odd to get used to new blogs being posted at the END of the week vice the beginning, but it's the only reason i look forward to going to work at night while all of YOU are OUT partying without me. shit. call me now. 808-473-7142. say hi. then hang up fool, i'm working!!! haha. yesterday was steel pulse at the shell. did you go? well before all that business i spent most of my day with my OTHER favorite client. OLENA. signature color.  coffee talk on waialaie  um. they paint the napkin holders in there. wow. that's so artsy i can barely handle it.  okay, sorry GOTTA have one more of these  time to waste more time. OOOOH! i just got another razr. i know i know. shut up. so we went to the bead store to MAKE a phone dangle! i know i know. how creative! *sigh* we're just cool laddat. spent the better part of an hour picking out the beads and then putting them together  it was like MAJOR SURGERY getting the damn thing on the phone. another hour! thank god olena has doctor hands.  time to waste MORE time. yummy messy frozen custard before:  yummy messy frozen custard after:  skip ahead to dinnertime. had to see my new best friends again at 808. we both had filet mignon. fucking delicious. dessert was a sweet potato taro pastry with some goat cheese something and chocolate sauce. good.  danny boy is practicing here for when he's a famous rockstar. they're always doing something obscure with their hands when photographed.  ON to lulus! dancehall raggae. remember? comedian jose was there with maleko. jose is trying to hear what's under the table i think.  when people dance to this music they always put their hands up. like those people on the religious shows when they're singing. they always put their hands up too.  kalei, as we all know, only has ONE dance  new CUSTOM phone dangle people!  awww zana. and who is that with you? kepa? NOBODY knows who HE is!  oh wait! i just remembered!!! i'm DRUNK! a bottle of wine and two cocktails in. oh dear. yes, i can tell now though. maleko is SO good at this.  note the shirt. note the sidekick. note the hat. now GUESS WHO!  awwwww! rasta!  this girl was scaring poor punkass. she was a bit odd, i'll admit  cat wasn't scared. she's tough laddat.  ed mooncal was even there! the WHOLE WORLD was there tonight  olena and her toungue made an appearance. her last night in town for a while. booooo.  the nachos at lulus are TO DIE for  so are the surfer boys  kepa? who? NOBODY knows this guy.  do you know mike? from kauai? oh. too bad.  very cool  some haole chick trying to be a badass  your two favorite neighborhood entrepreneurs  oh my god i'm hammered. poor guy. o welll he doesn't seem to mind.  so that's it for the week! so like i said... new blogs will be posted on THURSDAY-FRIDAY ish vice MONDAY-TUESDAY ish. mark your calendars. now get to commentin! (time finished blog: 1:03am) (break for conan) (break for two troublecalls) (break for bowl of cheerios) this weekend i AM WORKING NIGHTS people. do NOT call me unless you're calling the helpdesk to entertain me. i'm only available for daytime fun. or if you're still partying at 6am. (ahem. ERIC. SCOTT.) aloha music to listen to while waiting for everything else to load... and just to see HOW much i can put on here before crashing my computer postal service - such great heights |